The Asher Update

Dear Andy, Gloria, and Asher,
I have just looked at the pictures and spent last PM reading and looking at this site. Others have said the very things that we want to express. No one can say what our hearts feel. We love you and are praying for your. You must be exhausted in every way. He is our only hope when we are empty. He is hope. He said, "I am". Anne for Paul and I

she is gorgeous
she is my sister and my closest friend
i am numb and in emense agony
i will never be the same
we were one

you can see everything in her eyes.
her warmth,
her generosity,
her joy,
her parents.

i love you guys. i am so sorry.
don't know what to say do think feel.

My most sincere condolences to you and your family. I read your blog often and have seen the struggle you have gone through, and was totally blown away when I heard tragedy had struck your family again.

She was very beautiful, and by your description a wonderful human being.

God Bless You and your family.

im so sorry for the lose i wish u guys the best and my families prayers are with u and yous family.
-cody

Your family is in my prayers. I have very fond memories of Hadrienne. She truly was a special girl. Her kindness and love for others will always be remembered.

In my prayers,

Jenna

Mendonsa family,

I want to extend my heartfelt sympathy in the loss of your beautiful Hadrienne. I have not had the privilege of meeting your family, but I hope you feel the prayers of so many in our community surrounding you. May God's warmth and grace embrace you. Please be assured that your family is being lifted up in so much prayer at this time.

Blessings to you...

Your family is in our prayers. Hadrienne's life has blessed many other lives and those blessings can never be lost. May God's Ever-sustaining Grace guide, uphold and keep you.

Asher, Gloria and Andy,
Recieving the news today....my heart is broken. I'm so sorry to hear of the loss of Hadrienne. So many are thinking of you at Pathways and you will stay in our prayers. May He provide peace that passes all understanding.

Beth Jacquin

Dear Andy, Gloria, Asher,
Hadrienne will be forever missed and loved! I am so thankful we(Rich, Maureen, Dan, myself) were able to spend time with her over the summer and take in a Braves game. She was such a beautiful, sweet, spirited woman. It is too hard to believe. My heart is aching for your family. Just know that I love you, I am so sorry for your loss.
Love, Emily

Dear precious family of God.............we taste the salt of your tears as you grieve the loss of your precious daughter. You are in our prayers , as we also , "hold onto the truths that take away the bitterness of death". The Lord bless........Rob, Deb, and Ben Watlington

Andy, Gloria, & Asher:
Words just won't come. We are so weighted down. Mikaela called in tears from Chattanooga to tell us on Saturday. She was so touched when she discovered that Hadrienne had just added her as a friend to her "Face Book" Friday afternoon. Hadrienne was so special - we will always cherish her in our memories as a genuinely sweet and loving friend.
We have been praying that our Lord will show you a vision of Hadrienne's happiness with Him in heaven to carry you through the times of overwhelming grief. We will continue to lift you up for comfort, for peace, for rest, and for security in the knowledge that He is there for you - always.
With much love in Him -
Miriam, Jim, Mikaela, Aaron & Micah Larson

To the Mendonsas,
i always looked at you as a second family. I have always seen asher as my brother. He has been my best friend since i first met him, we always had each others backs. I couldn't believe it when i heard about his accident. And then i finally got to start talking to him on a regular basis again and i love that. Hadrienne was an amazing sister, and i could see how much she helped through the accident. This has been a horrible loss and i couldn't imagine the pain you all feel. God bless you all, my prayers are with you. Asher, i love you buddy. Please, all of you take care.

Andy,
I met you at the Signal Pres. Ministry Fair over a year ago and know you are a humble servant of our Lord. My thoughts and prayers go out to you and your family...

Margo Gardner

Andy, Gloria and Asher,

... just heard the news earlier today. My heart is heavy with deep sorrow for your family. The sadness is very real.

What to say? Can words assuage your grief? Man knows not his time. You guys continue in our prayers. Our hearts grieve for your family.

We pray God's peace for you. "Peace does not mean to be in a place where there is no noise, trouble or hard work. It means to be in the midst of those things and still be calm in your heart." (Anonymous)

"After the flood, God remembered Noah ... and the waters receded." (Gen 8:1) God will indeed remember you as well.

Hear our prayer(s). "Hear, O Lord, and be merciful to me; O Lord, be my help." (Ps 30:10)

"Be merciful to me, O Lord, for I am in distress; my eyes grow weak with sorrow, my soul and my body with grief. My life is consumed by anguish ..." (Ps 31:9-10)

We cry mercy for you. Our hearts are broken.

The Lord is my shepherd,

don

Don and Becky McGonagil
6754 Boundary Run
Nashville, TN 37221
615.646.3900 home
615.582.2296 wireless

I don't know you personally but I just spent about 2 hours reading your entire blog. The story of Job kept coming to my mind what you all have been through the past 6 months. Like Job, your Faith and strength in God has completely overwhelmed and inspired me. If anyone thought the story of Job was false, impossible, you've proved them wrong.

"And the LORD restored Job’s losses[a] when he prayed for his friends. Indeed the LORD gave Job twice as much as he had before. 11 Then all his brothers, all his sisters, and all those who had been his acquaintances before, came to him and ate food with him in his house; and they consoled him and comforted him for all the adversity that the LORD had brought upon him. Each one gave him a piece of silver and each a ring of gold." ~Job 42:10-12

Brother, you and your family are an inspiration to many. I know you wouldn't have chosen to be but God has chosen you to be. I'm terribly sorry for the loss of your beautiful daughter but it is the Lords gain. And a stranger and her family (me) will be praying for your continued strength, the peace that surpasses all understanding, and for Ashers continuing recovery...

Many hugs and prayers....

"Blessed are those who mourn, for they shall be comforted." Matt. 5:4 It is my prayer this early morning that today your entire family and extended family are comforted during your tearful goodbye to your wonderful daughter. I am confident that many a prayer of strength and understanding will be said today. We continue to pray for Asher's recovery and strength. May God give you peace beyond understanding and may he strengthen ya'll on this day.
Your Brother in Christ,
Michael Corron

Andy, Gloria, Asher,

We Helrigel's are devastated at your loss, and are hoping that 'the grace that changes everything' is with you all as it was when we lost our two precious sons Gilbert and Kepler. It was the peace that does pass understanding which carried us through those days of grief. Your mama's dream was a dream of Hadrienne at the top of Jacob's ladder, Andy, and the lovely box was empty already except for the red velvet of its true being, and she in the fetal position, ready to begin the eternal part of her life. He sends dreams we only understand after, so we don't fear, but later we know he signed his name to reassure us that we did nothing wrong, and it was His choice. I am so grateful the Lord let her remain a short time in spirit so that we all could say goodbye, even with the glory waiting for her behind the white curtain. I cannot tell you how brokenhearted I feel, even though the Lord let's us know through dreams such as these that he is still sovereign, and had long since planned the day she would first see his face. He has built her a beautiful place and a wardrobe made of all her favorite colors. I am the most inept of all those who have written here, because I do not grieve well, and still have to be helped by our dear Yeshua to grieve for my boys: I suppress it, and it surfaces at times such as these as fear and terrible sorrow. So give her all the tears you have, and let the pain come and bring the healing that follows it. You are so dear to the Lord, kind helpers of the forgotten widows, that you know he only draws you all closer in ways that will comfort the deepest places of your losses. He is digging the furrows deep, and the latter rains will come.

Chris Helrigel

Hi.. my name is Courtney Shepherd and I'm a sophomore at Chattanooga Christian school, we all are devestated at all of these horrible tradgedy's that keep occuring in your family. I wish I could answer why, and I wish that it could have been different. I cannot imagine what your family must be going through. I just wanted to tell you that Chattanooga Christian as a whole, has kept you and your family in it's prayers, and will most defintley continue!
God Bless
-Courtney Shepherd

Mendonsa's, I cannot even imagine what your family has gone through. When I was a freshman at CCS, Hadrienne was a senior. I never really knew her, but I always knew when she was around. She had such a joy about her. She has made an incredible influence on my dad, Dave Redd. Sometimes I wonder if the tears will ever stop--Hadrienne will always be remembered. Your family is in my thoughts and prayers. It is only through HIM that everyone will make it through. The only thing I know to say is that it was her time. There is no other explanation. May the grace of God always be with you. She is in the presence of the Lord right now!
Love, Christine

Our hearts ache for you. Hadrienne was such a beautiful young lady and so full of life, by all accounts loved by all who knew her. You are always in our thoughts and prayers. Dennis and Debbie

May God's grace continue to uphold you today. I continue to pray for you, as do all the prayer warriors on my email list! Thank you for being willing to be personal and vulnerable and share how He is prospering your souls. I look forward to worshipping with you as we stand in heaven and look at God face to face.
Virginia

Dear Asher, Andy & Gloria,

I am Mark's sister. This is a little strange for me because I'm not one to post my thoughts publicly, but over the last few days I have felt compelled to write to you. At least once every day since May 23 I have prayed for strength, courage, hope and continued faith for your family and all those who care for you. But never would I have imagined this horrible tragedy. "I'm sorry" just doesn't cut it anymore. Though I have only known the four of you a little, I truly love your family. Your faith in God inspires everyone around you, and I have never seen anything so moving.

Hadrienne had Thanksgiving with our family last year. We always celebrate the Friday after to avoid so many meals in one day. Today, being the Friday after, will be a little heart-breaking for us all I'm sure. I remember sitting beside her at the table, and I remember all the times Mark talked to me about her . . . how beautiful and wonderful and complex she was. He was enamored by her. I would have loved to have seen them together many years from now.

The service yesterday was so uplifting. It was the perfect goodbye, but my heart and my faith tells me this is not the end. And that gives me some peace. I pray for peace for your family during this Thanksgiving. We have so have so much to be thankful for . . . especially for Hadrienne. Thank you for sharing her with us. I love you guys!

Lindsey

Dear Mendonsa Family,

I have only heard of how touching this story is. I lost a close friend the same night due to another car wreck and I know how hard it is. Not necissarily that he was a family member but that I can feel the agony. I live in Lookout Valley and I have many friends that go to Lookout Valley and they were all upset and touched by the story and I go to CSAS where MANY, MANY people know Asher. I dont know the family but I was looking at the site and I just wanted to let you know how much support you have and how much everyone is standing behind you!! Remember, God will never leave your side and you dont have to worry about that at all! I will keep all of you and your family in our Thoughts and Prayers!

God Bless You,
Kelsey

It was great shock on our lives and the lives of the widows that pray 24/7 in our church to hear of the home going of your daughter. Our love and prayers for you are on high gear. may the lord give you his strenght to endure the trials.
servant joshua Atieno
widows harvest desk africa

Dear Mendonsa Family,

I have never truely met Asher or Hadrienne, but my older brother is good friends with him, as well as Josh and Mark. Ever since Ashers fall, I have been keeping up with how things are going with all of you. I think its safe to say, that many people across the WORLD are praying for your family! I know mine is! Im so sorry to hear about your loss, and you all will always be in my thoughts, and prayers

God bless you all!
Kelsey

not being in chattanooga wednesday evening to enjoy the sunset described in the blog,
i had to experience it vicariously. what was written was so encouraging in this week of tears
that i'm copying it so anyone missing the first writing can read it:

I hope that somehow you and Gloria caught a glimpse of what God blessed our city with tonight...
the evening after Hadrienne's spiritually moving funeral. When I went back out to the store this evening,
I crested the hill by my house and as I looked up, the sky from the top of the heavens all the way
to edge of the river was covered with bright pink, purple and blue waves of color.
It literally took my breath away. In all my 51 years, I have never seen anything like this, Andy.
It was SO much more than a beautiful sunset.
I noticed many cars had pulled over and were sitting there
in awe at the spectacular creation in front of them.
I did the same... and just sat there and cried.
It felt like a glimpse into the beauty that heaven holds for each of us...
and gave my heart some peace that Hadrienne was enjoying that beauty in it's fullness.
I hope you saw it... what a blessing!

Continuing to hold you up in prayer,
Shirley Madewell

I loved hearing about the sunset on the eve of Hadrienne's funeral. I remember an amazingly beautiful sky at the time of my Dad's funeral also; like the heavens had become visibly involved in our earthly affairs. I took it as an encouraging reminder: "I will make all things new".
It also reminds me of a story Effie & i read, while homeschooling, in which a character speaks at a decisive point in his life about his hope for when he leaves this world: "I want to leave a fine sunset". (i want to find the full quote again)
Surely, Hadrienne has.

Mendonsa family:
Arnie is an Elder at New Hope Christian Church where your sister, Becky, works and attends. Our whole staff as well as the church were deeply saddened and are lifting you up in our prayers. We are praying now for you that during your incredibly painful time and as you mourn that God will comfort you as He declares in Matthew 5:4. As we have prayed so many times (with so many others) for Ashers recovery we will continue to pray for all of you.

Still praying for you. My God shall supply all your need according to His riches in glory by Christ Jesus. (Phil. 4:19) I pray for your every need to be supplied by Him whose power created the heavens and the earth.

As with His disciples, we cry out to Jesus, for "To Whom else can we go?" Only Jesus has the Words of Life....He is the Faithful Savior, and our only hope in life and in death -- is that we belong, body and soul, to our Faithful Savior. (part of Heidelberg Catechism question 1) Such great comfort to know that Hadrienne is in the arms of her faithful Savior. I pray for your hope and peace to be steadfast, looking to Jesus.
Looking to Heaven in faith,
Selah

There you go
Swimming deeper into mystery
Here I remain
Only seeing where you used to be
Stared at the ceiling
'Til my ears filled up with tears
Never got to know you
Suddenly you're out of here

Gone from mystery into mystery
Gone from daylight into night
Another step deeper into darkness
Closer to the light

Walked outside
Summer moon was nearly down
Mist on the fields
Holy stillness all around
Death's no stranger
No stranger than the life I've seen
Still I cry
Still I begged to get you back again

Gone from mystery into mystery
Gone from daylight into night
Another step deeper into darkness
Closer to the light

From "Closer to the Light"
-Bruce Cockburn

Mendonsa Family,

Please accept the heartfelt condolences from someone who met Andy some 30 years ago. I know too well that nothing I say will change the course of events or the way you feel about them. I simply want to convey to you that you and your family are in our thoughts and prayers. Your pain reminds us of the fragility of life; your strength inspires us. May God Bless you and your Family.
Fernando

Dear Mendonsa family,
I am praying for you and your family daily, and you are always in my thoughts and prayers. Your family has meant so much to me. Mr. Mendonsa, it was so good to see you on saturday, that meant so much to me. I love you all.

I don't know what to say. I ache for you and your family. I am so sad and yet so totally blown away by your faith and steadfastness. Hadrienne was a beautiful and lovely young woman. We are praying for you each day and think of you often. We love you dearly. God will see you through this fire.

Kevin & Kelly

Dear Mendonsa Family,

I had the pleasure of working with Hadrienne at Ben and Jerry's. We became good friends and hung out outside of work a few times. She was such an inspiration to everyone. After everything that happened she always would come in with a smile on here face. She never complained, and she always looked on the bright side. I looked forward to when she would come back to town to visit. It was always an uplifting experience to see her. She was such a wonderful example of how people should be. She was kind, caring, and friendly. No words can totally sum her up. I know that I will never forget her. I am praying for your family. I know how hard this must be. She is with God now and we will all see her again one day. God bless your family.

Josh Cupples

my beautiful family, i miss you so! i miss your hugs and the sounds of your voices. i feel like things will be okay when i am with you all. will and i have talked about just going down and chillin at the staybridge just to maybe feel a little better.

last night was hard. i cried in my roommate Shaadi's bed until 4am. i tell you this not to be sad but for you to know how vital your pressence is to me in getting through this storm. i hope to see you very soon

hadrienne was my world and you hers. now she has passed you to me. i can't bear to take off her jeans, her headband, our ring. i reach deep into her pockets and squeeze where her hand once was.

today, like every day, i felt her. as i walked to class all bundled up in my pea coat, i smiled and reached beside me. i reached out for her hand and i no longer felt the sting of the wind. i held my hand tight and saw her smile; i didn't want her to leave my side again. she walked me to my class this morning and i'm sure she will meet me in my dreams tonight.

i now know what it is to have a broken heart. BUT i will help mend yours, and you mine.

i love you with all my heart and don't forget to smile for my angel because she is watching you too.

Dearest family,
I am continuing to pray for each of you, as are my prayer-warrior friends. I wish so much I could shoulder some of this burden for you. May the Lord continue to bless you with His comfort and peace.

Andy and Gloria: I don't believe that I have ever met you face to face, but I had the privilege of being Hadrienne's math teacher during her senior year at CCS. I really cannot put into words how highly I always thought of Hadrienne. She was (as someone said ) "every teacher's dream". I recall one day in particular where you(Andy) came and delivered a great chapel talk and Hadrienne introduced you that day. I remember in class afterward when Hadrienne and I talked about your message and how proud she was of you that day. I could just sense that she was very proud of who her parents were. I wish you could have seen her smile in class that day. You guys are always in my prayers. Thank you for allowing Hadrienne to be one of my dream students. -FW (Romans 8)

Dear Andy and family

My name is Evelyn and I just wanted you to know that my heart goes out to you. I am a Covenant College graduate and you may remember me. About 3 years ago, I was coming down lookout mountain in the rain, i fishtailed and nearly lost all control of my car. You were headed right up the mountain toward me and we almost collided. You had told your wife to brace herself. Somehow I pulled over to a side street and you stopped and helped me. I will never forget that. Thank you Andy for stopping and helping me call the police, talking to the police and just being an encouragement when I had almost hit you. You are in my prayers.

Evelyn Reith

I'm not sure what to say. I've never met you guys, but I feel that I know you all, because I was sent a link to your blog yesterday, and have read the entire thing. My heart is just busted open for you. Please know that I am standing with you, and also on my knees with you. I don't know what else to say. May God be with you all.

Hadrienne is so beautiful, I will never forget her in my apartment baking brownies with Skye and making fun of me for taking little squares instead of a normal piece. She always had a glow about her that I will never forget. God Bless
Skye's Roomate,
Shaadi Marand

Though the Lord gave you adversity for food and affliction for drink, he will still be with you to teach you.
You will see your teacher with your own eyes, and you will hear a voice say,
"This is the way; turn around and walk here."
Isaiah 30:20-21 (NLT)

All the nurses from Erlanger send our prayers out to your family,,you are truly special people who have touched our hearts,,there is nothing I can say to make your pain easier,,just know we share in your heart ache and will continue to pray for strength and understanding,,may peace be with all of you,,God Bless

Dear Family, we are constantly holding you in our thoughts and prayers. We love you deeply. Heard this song by Brad Paisley on the radio this morning while going to work and shed some tears (again).

When I get where I'm going
On the far side of the sky
The first thing that I'm gonna do
Is spread my wings and fly

I'm gonna land beside a lion
And run my fingers through his mane
Or I might find out what it's like
To ride a drop of rain

(Chorus:)
Yeah when I get where I'm going
There'll be only happy tears
I will shed the sins and struggles
I have carried all these years
And I'll leave my heart wide open
I will love and have no fear
Yeah when I get where I'm going
Don't cry for me down here

I'm gonna walk with my grand daddy
And he'll match me step for step
And I'll tell him how I missed him
Every minute since he left
Then I'll hug his neck

(Chorus)

So much pain and so much darkness
In this world we stumble through
All these questions I can't answer
So much work to do

But when I get where I'm going
And I see my maker's face
I'll stand forever in the light
Of his amazing grace
Yeah when I get where I'm going
There'll be only happy tears
Hallelujah
I will love and have no fear
When I get where I'm going
Yeah when I get where I'm going

Paisley Brad
"Time Well Wasted"

I see Hadrienne in every sunset and feel her in every ray of sun - she is always with us, as is God.
Much love, Helen

To the Mendonsa Family,
hi. My name is Chad Watson, and I go to Buckhead Church in Atl., Ga. (I go to the student ministry called Inside Out.)
Anyways, i saw ur blogs, and i have to say, that u are the most brave and amazing people i have ever heard of. I was never a true believer in God, but it's things like this that make me understand that there must be a God with us. God Bless you all, and i want u to kno that u got me to believe.
Chad

I started randomly thinking about Hadrienne while studying for a final just now. I wish I had known her better. I graduated from CJR just before she started. She always struck me as having her life so perfectly in order. People like that are so rare. My prayers are with you.
-Andy Coniglio

i honestly sit here devastated by what I learned today about your family. i cannot fathom the depth of pain. the pain God has allowed me to sense for you is nearly unbearable but it cannot even come close to what is so real in your hearts.

a young man passed away recently here - he touched many lives as your dear Hadrienne has - this was said of him - our loving Father - who created Hadrienne - knitted her in your womb - her creator, so desperately wanted her home. so He could pull her into His loving arms as His little girl and hold her tight. I'm so sorry and wish He hadn't - for your sakes - and this lousy world's as well - but i pray you'll find comfort somewhere in knowing that truth.

i sit silently from here with you in your sorrow and pray that He will somehow embrace you to ease this pain.

in His grip - Clay

With my deepest symphaty and kindest regards on your loss. I wish you and your family the best at the time.

Andy and Gloria,
We are so sorry for your loss and know that there are no words that can be said to ease your pain. We never met Gloria or your children and I am very sorry for that. I just wanted to let you know that Herman and I, as well as all of your old Atlanta friends, have you in their thoughts and prayers. We are all here for you..you only need to ask.
Sherry & Herman

What a beautiful person from what I have read and seen from this site alone. Selfishly I was on Google bored and wanted to see if i was on the net, when i happened on your site. please forgive me as I am your cousin and i knew nothing of your family. My deepest condolences can i only offer. "Father I ask in your holy name that you would be the Mendonsa's shield and their Great Reward. Father settle their hearts during this time of great hurt and sorrow. Allow them to grieve and to find joy in the memories of their beloved. Show them your healing attributes your redeeming power and the restoration power, Lord, that only you possess. Father I praise you for what you will do nad for what you have done for all. AMEN"

Andy, we continue to pray for continued strength for you and your family. Surely, Hadrienne has received her reward in heaven and is walking with Jesus. Your glimpse of Hadrienne in heaven was God's tender gift to you and your family. He is so merciful! Praise His holy name for ever and evermore. Peace and joy in Jesus. Amen

Dear Andy Gloria and Asher,

We feel so fortunate to have known Hadrienne during our stay at the Shepherd Center. Her smile, her sense of humor, her love for all of you. She is so beautiful and so sweet and kind. We saw all of that in the few moments we were lucky enough to have spent with her. We saw the love between her and Asher.

The strength and inspiration that Hadreinne gave to Asher is immeasurable. She provided priceless love and support to him day in and day out. The love between them is unquestionable and unending and infinite. She put her life on hold without question and without regret, never looking back. There are not words to convey the depth of a love that deep and a dedication that strong.

We also know that you both were concentrating on Asher all these months, and that Hadrienne happily supported you and would not have wanted it any other way.

We can only imagine the horrors of these past weeks since Hadrienne is gone. Having to spend the holidays without her. But we believe in your vision--the one where you saw Hadrienne wearing a crown--we believe that with all of our hearts. We are thinking of you and praying for continued strength and courage for you all.

Asher, we miss you and will never forget the kindness that you showed to Shayna at Shepherd Center.

Love,

The Heeter Family
Ray, Cendy, Travis, Shayna and Corie.