The Asher Update

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August 12, 2005

Asher's Request, August 12, 1 PM

asher has asked me to ask for visitors. this is the first day that he has really asked for that. i have explained to him that since we are in atlanta, and school is starting back it is hard for his friends to come visit, especially during the week. visitation from friends and family probably does more single good than all of his therapies combined. when asher gets visitors his whole countenance is quite noticeably changed. now that his stamina for staying up longer has improved so much in the last few days he is able to have visitors for much longer. which was not the case even a week ago, when, sometimes, after only ten minutes or less asher would be ready for his visitors to leave. thankfully, that does not seem to be the case now.

asher has been doing really well the last few days, his spirits are up and he has been eating most of his meals. this is such an amazing change, and long awaited anwer to prayers. asher also has his neck brace off too. he had worn this brace since the night he was first injured. the last week or so that he had to wear it he was just about to go crazy with it on. his neck would get so hot and sweaty and along his jaw line and chin was always iching. it is so amazing how different he looks now without it. he looks like the old asher, just minus 40 pounds. that is how much weight he has lost since he has been in the hospital. now that he is eating he should begin to start gaining some of that back.

asher's therapies are also going really well. it is amazing what a difference a change in attitude, and eating well has done to both his stamina and response to his therapists. just in the last couple of days asher has been able to stay in his chair from 8 AM to 6 or 7 Pm without wanting to get back in his bed or taking a nap in his chair. we are just so thankful for all of these changes for the better.

asher was moved to a semi-private room on monday about the time i was leaving to go to dalton for tommy haymes viewing. he has a really nice new roommate who is from pittsburg. it is always hard for asher (and us) to change rooms, but asher (and us) seems to have adjusted pretty quickly, even though he found the room to be fairly depressing at first. with a new room has also come a new schedule for us. when asher was in a private room we were able to spend the night with him, so gloria and i took turns doing that. now that he is in a semi private room we can't spend the night with him any more. now our schedule is that we alternate coming to the hospital by 7 AM each morning so that we can feed him and be with him until his therapies start. he has speech, occupational and physical therapy every day during the week and is usually finished with all of them, though, by 2 or 3 PM. his weekends are fairly free with just one therapy on saturday, and sunday is completely free.

this new schedule seems to be working pretty well. it has allowed us to alternate throughout the day each day so that we can get more rest and get other things done that need to be done like buying groceries and getting the laundry done. the only kink is when i have to go back to chattanooga and gloria has to be at the hospital from 7 until asher goes to sleep around 9 or 10 pm with no relief. when hadrienne is here she is able to help out, but sometimes she is also in chattanooga when i am too. please continue to pray for strength and rest. getting overly tired just takes so many days to recover.

hadrienne and i will be traveling back to chattanooga late this afternoon to help move all of our furniture out of our house tomorrow so that it can be stored until all the work has been done to restore our house. work still hasn't started yet, but i am hoping and praying that it won't be much longer.

while we are gone gloria won't have any relief. please pray that she is able to get enough rest so that she won't get too worn out before we come back.

i want to give thanks to all of those who have come out already throughout the week to pack things up as well as all of those who will be coming out on saturday to help. i especially want to thank larry reed. larry is one of my oldest and dearest friends and i can't express enough appreciation for all he has done to put this moving day together. thank you lord.

as i mentioned earlier i left atlanta monday afternoon to go to dalton for visitation with tommy haymes family and. visitation was supposed to be from 5 to 8 PM, but the line was so long (the average wait was 3 hours) that the last person got in at 11:01 PM. it was truly a testament to the life that tommy lived and the ways that it affected the lives of so many. i am privileged to have been one of those lives and i truly give thanks to the Lord for allowing me to be one of them.

hardly a moment of the day has slipped by since i received the news that tommy had died that i don't think about him and his family. i believe my mourning for him will no pass quickly. it is not that i am not able to rejoice in where he is right now, with jesus. no one i have ever known wanted to be with jesus more than tommy. he had an amazing trust and faith in God that was born out of many earthly struggles and victories. tommy had no fear of dying, in fact, 3 weeks before he died he was talking to his very close friend alfred johnson and he told him that if anyone ever told him that he had died not to believe them. that was because tommy knew, that as a christain, the hope and promise of eternal life was based on his immovable belief in the promises for such a life that are made in the new testament for those who accept jesus as the promised messiah.

i know first hand that, who tommy believed could qualify for what was prophetically written in the jewish bible as the standards for being able to recognize who the true messiah was when he came, to the very depths of his being was jesus. therefore, because of that belief, he lived his life based on all the hopes and promises that were given to him by the written accounts of jesus's life in the new testament. based on this, perhaps the greatest legacy that tommy left was for jesus's own example for denying himself. jesus placed his father's will completely ahead of his own and by doing this the outcome was that he also placed the needs of others above his own, and this kind of denial of self and devotion to others can be summed up with only two words: unconditional love. historically, there have been many who have claimed and will claim to be the messiah, but the true measure must be based on some standard and that standard must be rooted in absolute truth, and for tommy i know that if the outpouring of that truth does not manifest itself in the complete denial of self and the propagation of a justice and mercy that flows out of unconditional love that sees as it's greatest act as one of being able to sacrifice one's own life on behalf of others, then the credibility for that person's claims for being either a messiah, or the messiah, must be called into question.

there is obviously much more to the high standard that the true messiah must be held up to in order to prove his legitimacy, especially for him to be able to assure that a belief and trust in him will insure that, like tommy said, "if someone tells you i'm dead don't believe them," because he knew with no doubts in his mind, what-so-ever, that leaving this world meant an immediate entering into an existence of life everlasting in God's presence. tommy, without a doubt, lived out that belief every day of his life like few people i have ever known. even in times of great turmoil and strife i never heard him complain and he was always quick to demonstrate joy and a deep sense of thanksgiving. for a complainer like me, i was constantly in awe this kind of faith.

blessings and thanksgiving to you all for your continued prayers and support. asher's continued progress as well as all the support that continues to come our way with things like getting help moving our possessions out of our house can all, without any doubt in my mind, be attributed to all of you.

continuing to be humbled by the passing of a great friend, saint and brother,

andy mendonsa

| By Andy Mendonsa | 08:41 AM

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